Happy New Year! Here’s What’s Next.

Hey, y’all!

I only have a few minutes left on my lunch break, but I wanted to check in and say hi!

Programming Note: On Friday, I’ll share something a little more personal, instead of my usual #FridayFive. Next week, I’ll talk a little bit more about my 2019 reading challenge (which my very wise wife suggested I cut down from a very ambitious #100Stories to a more realistic #50Stories–but hey, no reason to stop at 50 if I make it, right?). We may also chat a bit about internet outrage, in light of my 2019 goal to use social media for the good of others. We’ll jump back in with the weekly #FridayFive next weekend. I’ve also got some pretty fun news to share in the coming weeks, so stay tuned for that.

In other words, I’m excited about upcoming posts this month, and I hope you are, too!

But for now, I just wanted to kick off 2019 by saying thanks again for reading, and I look forward to sharing ideas and interacting with you this year!

What are you most looking forward to in 2019? Let me know in the comments!

“I’ve been thinkin’ ’bout you…”

“Do you think about me still? Do ya? Do ya?”

It’s been a while since I’ve just sat down and started typing a blog post. The last few months…I don’t know. When it comes to this blog, I think I started out trying too hard to do it “the right way”–not writing, but “creating content,” not communicating but “building an audience.” And then it started feeling fake, so I pretty much stopped. My words dried up. I want to keep writing, but I don’t know if I want to keep doing it this way, you know? (And it’s not like I’ve been posting that much content, generic or otherwise. We both know I haven’t posted much of anything lately. Every time I sit down to write, I start getting all knotted up over it. Not writer’s block as much as writer’s rebellion. I’m not sure what my problem is.)

While working on something for a friend, I started digging through my past blog posts–I mean the early, early days of my blogs. Have you ever read diary or journal entries you wrote more than 15 years ago? Cringe-y is the word.

And yet, while I’m embarrassed by my emotional immaturity on display in those best-forgotten days, I was struck as I read the posts by how much fun they were to read. (No, I’m not humble-bragging or post-facto-bragging or any such thing.) It was just so clear that I loved writing. I loved writing blog posts, stringing together turns of phrase and pop-culture references and song lyrics. I was much more open and unvarnished and emotive. I bled on the screen.

I think I miss doing that, a little.

Things are different now. Times have changed. I’m no longer a young man in my early 20’s with a keyboard and a broken heart. I’m now a middle-aged man in my late 30’s, with a wife and a daughter and responsibilities–not quite where I hoped I would be by now, but getting there. At this stage in the game, I don’t need to be giving full-vent to my spleen in this format. I’m an adult. I need to act like one. To be honest, I don’t really want to go back to treating blogging like a public diary–that’s what Xanga is for. (Any of you kids remember Xanga? No? Just me? Okay.)

(No, I don’t actually have a Xanga. Actually, I think I did at one point years and years back, but the log-in has been long forgotten.)

[What was I on about? Oh yeah.]

I haven’t posted anything “from the heart” since mid-July, it looks like. And who knows, maybe that’s for the best. Maybe that’s what you readers want: that I should stick to book reviews, interesting-link aggregation, a bit of this and that about writing and freelancing, and some Bible study blogging. Maybe that’s why you’re here, really. Maybe that can be enough.

What I’m getting at is this: the blog is just starting to feel a bit shallow to me. I don’t want that to be the case, but I’m not sure if or how I should change that.

Maybe nothing ultimately changes. Maybe I just need to start writing more and trust that it will start feeling natural again. I don’t know.

I’ve been wanting to say something to y’all for a few weeks, but I kept waiting for some great idea to kick me back into gear. The idea never came.

Here’s the update from my side of the screen: I’m busy with work, with church, with life stuff. I’m still putting off creative work that I am a bit too afraid to really commit to finishing, but even more afraid of giving up thinking about. There are a dozen things right now that need attention in my life and I’m constantly having to assess and reassess which priorities are most important.

But I miss talking to you, gang. So I’m checking in to let you know I’ve been thinking ’bout you (ooh na-na-na). And I hope you think about me still.

Happy October.

This is Where I Am Right Now (TIWIARN): 7/16/18

This isn’t going to be super-long, but I want to give an update/explanation of what will be happening with the blog throughout the rest of the summer and likely into the fall.

The thing I struggle with, vis-a-vis blogging, is that I’m torn between two desires: the desire to build a portfolio of work for the day when I really transition to “professional writer mode,” and I’m ready to up my profile and start promoting creative work using the blog (the “Jeff Goins” method); and the desire to use this blog as more of a journal, filtered but honest, less focused, more free-form and personal (the “Xanga” method).

At this point, with the current load of obligations and projects I have going on, I don’t think I’m up to providing consistent original content that isn’t of the public diary, TIWIARN variety. I’ve been thinking a lot about goal setting since reading Finish! by Jon Acuff. Part of that goal-completion process is deciding what things I am willing to intentionally “fail” at, in order to prioritize other things. To be honest, “consistent blogging” is one of those things. (“Aren’t you doing that already, Dave, har har har”–fair enough.)

So, despite what I posted a week and a half ago, I’m actually going to pull back a little more from blogging, rather than worry about producing more. I’m going to post book reviews/reflections as I finish them, either individually or in batches. I’ll post some “Friday Fives” when I have the chance. I’ll throw in some of these update-type, TIWIARN posts. But that’s gonna be the vibe of the blog for a while.

Obviously, this will affect if or how often I post elsewhere, like The 4thDave Papers. (Sorry, Tuck.) It’s something I will probably pick up again in the future, but I can’t make any guarantees. I really shouldn’t have said anything about it until I had a few posts “in the can,” as they say. But who knows? Maybe I’ll surprise you sometime.

[Good grief, does this post sound as tired as I think it does?]

Thing is, I’m not tired. I’m doing pretty well, all told. A bit frustrated with a stubborn scale, moving in the wrong direction despite my faithful efforts. I’m a bit anxious for a friend of mine and a project he’s battling to keep going. I’m feeling really busy and at the same time like I’m in a bit of a rut. I want to do a dozen things and none of them at the same time.

So, for the time being, I really just need to put my head down, write a few book reviews, work on the other stuff in my life, and not worry about it. This blog is not my life, and it’s not my job. It’s a hobby that I enjoy from time to time, but one that I can and should set aside when other things need more attention.

You folks who have started following me recently–thank you for that. I hope you’ll be willing to keep my on your feeds for a while until I can get this other stuff figured out and start churning out words worth reading.

That’s all I got today, folks. See you around.